Monday, January 5, 2009

I'll just sit at the kids' table

Despite my weekend of enjoyed seclusion, I did venture out for a few social events. It seemed like the healthy thing to do at the time, and it's hard to explain to people that you have no plans but no, you don't want to hang out.

I watched
Baby Mama one night (don't judge me) and it was a strange night. My wardrobe matched Tina Fey's almost exactly. She was a single working woman, content to be single. And the kicker? I had just had the conversation the night before about how it has been my plan to start the adoption process at age X with or without Mr. Man. I was unsettled, and then the weekend came.

On Friday night I went to a casual get together with about 20 friends. These are great people and I am thankful to have them in my life. That said, the only other single girl in the place was a sophomore in college. In that house full of people my age, everyone was in some state of engagement bliss, honeymoon bliss, marital bliss, child bearing bliss, or the bliss of being the wise one who is out of bliss mode and can offer sage advice to those following. I listened to honeymoon stories ("...and then they pulled him up on stage to hula dance!"), baby stories ("he's doing the funniest thing right now"), pregnancy stories (there were three pregnant girls, so I don't even know which blip would be best here), and I left in the midst of ultrasound stories and how to work and be a full time mom.

The next day, I went to a friends' wedding, where I ran into all of my married college friends. The singles list is ever so short now. I can provide a full rundown of wedding types, music, pictures, slideshow ideas, food options, and activities to provide during the reception. For what it's worth, my wedding is going to be awesome (namely because I plan on eloping).

I am not jealous. I am not sad, or lonely. I do not hate men. I am not hunting. I think this throws people off. They pat me on the back and tell me that I will find "him" soon". Here's the thing: I am happy! I am okay! I enjoy being single right now! There is still so much out there for me to do and see. When Mr. Man comes along, great. Until then, there is plenty of life to enjoy.

I am thrilled for my happily married friends, and I am cool to talk about all of the parts of their married, babied life (seriously, I love your kids). That said, I have very little to offer to group ultrasound conversations. Maybe my life will end like every cliche chick flick where Independent Single Woman is swept off her feet in the last twenty minutes, right before she gives up completely and returns to her empty apartment and ice cream. Maybe I too will join in on the ultrasound fun. Until then, I will be continue to be fine, and I guess I will eat at the kids' table.

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